Ask Bil Anything

Penny asks,

Bil, could you give us a column about PeaceLoveJoyHopeKindness for the new year? I’m surrounded by bad news. Four people died in a fireworks blast, thirty more injured, many critical, and most were children. Where’s the Joy?

Thank you, Penny, for the question. No one has ever asked me that before, but my phrase PeaceLoveJoyHopeKindness does have a history.

Peace

After college, I was commissioned as a second lieutenant in the US Marine Corps. That decision was influenced by my college lacrosse coach, a highly decorated US Marine Corps officer in World War II.

I enjoyed being a Marine. I had many interesting experiences and was able to travel all over the Pacific basin. I made rank quickly. Second lieutenant to captain in two years. I had orders to go to Annapolis to teach and do “spit and polish work.”

Privately, I had been wrestling with the idea of being a killer. It didn’t fit me. War is stupid and run by the rich, who ask our youth to sacrifice themselves for their own pocketbooks. Intuitively, I knew that I would much rather love people than kill them. So out of the Marines and into the Episcopal seminary I went.

Sorry, Marines, but peace is the answer.

Love

When I started seminary, I was brainwashed into believing that Jesus died for our sins. But the more I studied and preached that idea, the more I thought it was Paul’s idea and not Jesus’s. As I was introduced to the historical Jesus, I became thoroughly convinced that he was about agape, unconditional love for everyone. Agape became my raison d’être for living. Every morning when I get up, I know exactly what I have to do every day: love everyone, forgive them quickly, and care for everyone no matter where they are on their life’s journey. Agape has made my life easy because I have to leave my biases, prejudices, and hang-ups behind. Agape has no room for anything but unconditional love for everyone. This kind of love is transformational.

Joy

My father, who was also an Episcopal priest, had his mantra, “Joy! Joy! Joy!” I heard it so much that it finally sank in. Joy is a choice—a good choice. No matter how horrendous things seem to be here and all over the world, I have so many reasons to live a life of joy. I can never let via negativa be a part of my life. Joy helps me move forward despite the overwhelming amount of bad news.

Hope

I think I am a healthy, well-adjusted, loving ninety-three-year-old man. I know as my faith keeps growing, I still have great hope for the future church (as hard as they try, they can’t kill Jesus) and the power of our Constitution (much stronger than the Christian Nationalists). I cannot allow a mood of hopelessness and helplessness to permeate my life. That’s why I left the institutional church at this age and stage of my life. They keep straightening the ecclesiastical deck chairs on the sinking Titanic. Despite the institution, I still have great hope for the future church built on the transforming power of agape. Hopelessness, for me, is a death knell.

Kindness

I added kindness to my phrase about a year ago, borrowing it from the present mayor of my city, Irvine, who for forty years has fought through all sorts of adversity in his political history to keep his city true to its mission. Regardless, he is still a kind, caring human being who has always refused to accept outside money. His campaign has always refused to do dirty politics. He goes door-to-door to talk with the residents of his city. He has become our mayor because of his kindness.

You know as well as I do that kindness gets us a lot further ahead than the ugliness that seems to be the order for so much of our society today.

So, Penny, that’s why I keep preaching PeaceLoveJoyHopeKindness.

Bil

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P.S. People often ask me provocative questions about current events, both religious and secular. I have found that some of these questions are being asked universally. I’ll be periodically alternating regular articles with one of those questions and my answer. I invite you to send me your question to bilaulenbach@yahoo.com.